April Fools!
No, kidding. April slam. April poetry slam. It’s purely a coincidence that this slam went live on the last day you have to get something on the fiction|poetry grid for the first day of April.
ANYWAY.
For 2020 our poetry slams are exploring technique, using example poetry to show that technique in action and then emulating it. This month we’re turning to editor Asha’s favorite form of poetry, one that I deeply regret introducing her to last year but one I promised I would use in a slam this year. And it’s been a hard year so let’s all do something nice for Asha.
Let’s — I can’t believe I’m writing these words — lik the bred.
What’s bredlik?
Bredlik is a poetry form based on a very famous poem by British author Sam Garland, better known by his Reddit handle Poem_for_your_sprog. In response to a thread of health violations seen by inspectors, one poster told a story about his stepfather, who was involved in historic recreation, and whose kitchen had been inspected and was passing until the inspector spotted a cow roaming around, licking bread that had been set out to cool. Garland, whose favorite pastime was turning popular comments into poems, posted the following:
my name is Cow,
and wen its nite,
or wen the moon
is shiyning brite,
and all the men
haf gon to bed –
i stay up late.
i lik the bred.
The poem was an instant hit. It spawned songs, images, memes and imitators, netwide. And it’s the basis for our April poetry slam.
What makes it work?
Bredlik isn’t as easy as it looks, folks. It’s a very tight form with very tight parameters.
Technically bredlik is four lines (two rhyming couplets) in iambic tetrameter, or two stanzas of four lines each in iambic diameter with an ABCB rhyme scheme.
The other thing that bredlik has going on is that the original poet took inspiration for the poem not only from the incident but from the fact that it happened in a re-enactor setting. So he used 18th century spellings (or reasonable facsimiles thereof) for some of the words.
Let’s break that down.
What’s iambic diameter?
Iambic diameter is the way to describe a poem whose lines are composed of two (di) iambs (a type of metric foot). An iamb is a two-beat combination where the stress lands on the second beat. So one line of iambic diameter can be read aloud as “and-ONE and-TWO.”
Confused? There’s more help on scansion here and here and here.
So.
Each line of bredlik scans u/ u/
let’s try it: my NAME is COW. yup. u / u /
I cannot stress (pun intended) this enough: EACH OF YOUR LINES MUST BE IN IAMBIC DIAMETER. Four beats, with beats 2 and 4 stressed.
What’s a rhyme?
I’m honestly not going to condescend to you and assume you have no idea what a rhyme is. I will, however, point out that every other line in a bredlik poem rhymes, and that there are two rhyme sounds to the poem.
So: Nite/brite, and bed/bred. Those are the rhymes. Your rhymes need to go in those exact same places. Got it? Good.
About that spelling thing…
Hi, I’m an editor and I’m giving you permission to mess with spelling.
HOWEVER. There are some rules. For example, if there’s a fantastic Shakespearean spelling, you should definitely use that one. Don’t just spell things wrong. Look how “shining” became “shiyning” in the original poem, rather than “shinning” or “shynyng.” Look for plausibly old misspellings. And remember, to make your poem read smoothly, you shouldn’t choose spellings that make people stumble or guess at the pronunciation of your word.
Need some more examples? Here you go. Consider, like these folks, including a funny photo that serves as your inspiration. Or not! Take the poem where you need to. Just follow the very strict (sorry!) form. Make Asha proud.
Why is it bredlik?
Look at the meter: my NAME is DOG / and WEN i SEE.
Look at the rhymes: see / me and tred / hed.
Look at the spelling: wen, snek, altho, rite.
Why is it bredlik?
Look at the meter: with TENder HART / and GENtle TUNG
Look at the rhymes: day/play and tung/son (this is a half-rhyme but it’s close!)
Look at the spelling: tu, hart, tung
Why is it bredlik?
Look at the meter: i DOnut TAKE / a SINgle REST
Look at the rhymes: day/ray and rest/chest
Look at the spelling: wen, shiyning, gard
About the author:
Rowan submitted exactly one piece of microfiction to YeahWrite before being consumed by the editorial darkside. She spent some time working hard as our Submissions Editor before becoming YeahWrite’s Managing Editor in 2016. She was a BlogHer Voice of the Year in 2017 for her work on intersectional feminism, but she suggests you find and follow WOC instead. In real life she’s been at various times an attorney, aerialist, professional knitter, artist, graphic designer (yes, they’re different things), editor, secretary, tailor, and martial artist. It bothers her vaguely that the preceding list isn’t alphabetized, but the Oxford comma makes up for it. She lives in Portlandia with a menagerie which includes at least one other human. She tells lies at textwall and uncomfortable truths at CrossKnit.
