I shall now participate in this week’s Monday Listicles from Stasha by way of Wendy at Twisted Domestic Goddess.
Wendy’s original prompt was something like 10 Things I Would Rather Do Than Clean the House. Well, um, for me, that’s everything, anything else. The list would be quite extensive and would include stuff like sit on my bed and watch TV. I hate to clean and the lazies are upon me. So, I’m twisting the list around: I’d rather clean my entire house than do these 10 things:
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Attempt to have a rational discussion with my mother when she knows she’s wrong. In more than 40 years, she has never apologized to me, and it’s stupid of me to ask her to see my side of the argument. After one such yelly (her, not me) discussion today, I came home and cleaned the kitchen.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Watch another episode of Hoarders. I’m an anti-fan of reality, trash TV, yet that show holds a morbid attraction for me. But there’s only so much I can take even when my own sink is filled with dirty dishes. When I think CPS might be on its way over, I call my cleaning service.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Play board games with my kids. I know, I know. Bad mother. But gaw. The picking of the board tokens, the rolling of the die, the four hours at the kitchen table moving about the board, the noise of happy children. I usually cut the game time in half then make everybody clean the den.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Go to the hair salon. I spent most of my youth and young adulthood wasting four hours every Saturday in a salon, waiting, washing, drying, straightening, curling. These days, I’m either wearing my hair natural or throwing on this super cute hair piece I found on the Web. The salon and its weekly 60 bucks will probably never see me again. That’s cleanin’ crew money.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Put away the laundry. Hey, does anyone else hear the kids’ bathroom calling me?[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Get kicked in the head by my toddler each and every time he’s the red or blue Power Ranger, which is early and often whenever I’m sitting next to him. When I’m not being overtaken by the lazies, it’s better for me to keep moving, and that sometimes involves a little sink scrubbin’.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Attend any evening school functions. Man, I do not do groups or social events with school parents. It’s not like I get out of them by saying I have to clean the garage or anything. I just don’t go. Then I nap and watch TV.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Go back to psychotherapy. I very seriously have no chemical imbalance a clean room cannot cure. Or new furniture. Or sushi delivery. And a newly released album download on iTunes.[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Descend into madness. Alas…[/stextbox]
[stextbox id=”dustpan”]Pull weeds from what was intended to be my spice garden, but is now my weed garden. Ooh-wee, my floors sure could use some mopping.[/stextbox]
Getting to 10 things for this list was more than a notion. There are not very many things at all that I hate more than cleaning my house. Thanks for the writing challenge, Stasha and Wendy. This was fun.
Love your spin on the list. Especially enjoyed #8. When it gets to the point that I think it may be time to visit the shrink again, I work like hell to implement behavior modification. I’ve not ever used cleaning the house for therapy, though. I think I would have to be in really bad shape for that. 😉
Oh my goodness, oh my goodness – I loved this list!
Another treat from you, Erica! Thanks for sharing some smiles.
Love it! I would much rather clean than put laundry away!
Haha! I love how you turned this around. And the Power Rangers need to go away…permanently. That’s one show I do not like.
Wonderful list!!
We try not to watch it past 6pm. It keeps Ehren awake all night! Hi-ya!
Ha ha ha I love your list!
Thanks, Audrey!
It’s Monday Erica? Besides Listicles, it’s also Hoarders night on A&E! I love that show, coupled with the dose of Intervention! Best.Reality.Shows.on.TV!
I’m usually buried in a Team Umizoomi marathon no matter which day of the week it is. Ugh.
Awesome. i hate cleaning but you have just proven that there are worse tings than cleaning. For sure.
Thanks for stopping by, Teresa! There’s always something worse than the things we hate doing. Complaining can be fun, though 🙂
Love your take on this LMAO 1 Mom’s can be wrong? Hoarders is like television cack and makes me feel way better about the state of my own house. I do love board games though.
My husband likes them, too. You’d think he’d play them with the kids while I napped, but he’s all into “family time”, whatever that’s supposed to mean.
Noah has been asking us to play “Clue,” which we got him for Christmas, since Christmas. Please don’t make me do it. Please, let me come do your laundry. Or vacuum. Two of my most favoritest chores in the world. And FYI your kids MAY stay at my home. Keeps Noah out of my hair.
My middle kid is the neighborhood’s designated “keeper out of the hair.” Parents have him on speed dial: he keep their kids occupied on the Wii or Xbox, doesn’t eat much and he’s quietly polite. I wish he’d bring that personality to visit my house every once in a while.
OK – wow. I love you even more than I already do.
1. Your mother: People who are always right really get to me because there is no penetrating them. Sometimes your best weapon in this situation is to sigh in a passive-aggressive manner and say, “Hmm,” or, “That’s interesting.” In my experience this really gets a rise out of them. (-;
2. Hoarders – I share your morbid fascination with this show, utterly, and this is why we had to get rid of the TV.
3. Board Games – for me, getting the game out of the box is – well – it’s too much. Then dealing with E’s propensity for cheating and playing dirty, and it always ends with a tantrum if I attempt to play fairly – either that or I have to let her win and have the guilt – altogether, whole thing sucks.
Totally hear ya!
1. I stopped talking and just let her scream. I learned that tactic working in customer service for FedEx when irate customers were tracking their Lands End turtlenecks like it was the end of the world.
2. Hoarders makes me feel better about my lack of housekeeping skills, but then I feel one step behind them which makes we feel worse.
3. I’m glad I’m not the only parent who hates board games with the kids.
Haha. Great twist on the topic!!
Thanks, Jenn!
An aversion to pulling out weeds? That’s why my dream veggie patch is now still a virgin jungle! Or maybe I just can’t get away from cleaning the house. Nice twist to the theme, Erica!
You’d rather go to evening school functions than clean?
I feel like I don’t know you anymore.
It’s the other way around. This list is things I’d rather clean the house before doing. And the school function thing, I don’t even make up excuses, I just don’t show up. Then my evening involves popcorn and premium cable.
I love the twist you did for this one and the awesome lego picture! Even though I hate our weekly Saturday clean, I too go straight for the cleaning and scrubbing in times of heavy stress or sadness. Way cheaper than therapy and clutter makes me feel like the walls are closing in. I’d also rather clean than take another toddler kick to the head as well! LOL – great list!
There are times my husband has to declutter me by throwing away all my stuff, but it is cathartic, I must admit.
I hear you on the weed thing. Love gardening. Hate weeding. I invite other people’s kids over to play board games with my son. Free Twitter time for mama!
I love the other people’s kids idea. I think I copyrighted it in 1997, so don’t forget to send my lawyer a check after your next sleepover.
Seems we share aversion to putting away laundry and school functions. And a few others for that matter. OK, the only thing I would do rather then clean is pull weeds out.
Awesome list my friend!
You and Wendy gave me a workout! Thanks for having me, my friend.